25 December 2010

Christmas Shat

I wake up Christmas morning and find Carole (Russ's mom) in the living room. I wanted to tell Russ it was like waking up from one nightmare into another. My sister wanted a non-traditional Christmas lunch so we had a Prime Rib the size of a basketball ($77) because Donna doesn't believe in normal size food, rosemary salt crusted rack of lamb, twice stuffed potatoes from scratch, cold cuts Chef salad served in an inverted punch bowl, my staple deviled eggs I made to look like spiders because I had olives to burn, and Donna's homemade strawberry cheese cake that takes a good 5 hours to make. I made a Japanese steak sauce called Yum Yum Sauce for the Prime Rib that everyone said tasted like cheap Southwest ranch salad dressing (fuck you all...except you mom).

It's suppose to rain tonite so I'll be on the rowing machine working off the lamb and my lame frustrations instead of running.

So how was YOUR Christmas? (I'm being rhetorical, I really don't want to know).


  1. fine. then I won't tell you. who am I kidding? I spent 6 hours driving today... at least the food was good.

  2. At least tell me they sent you off with some leftovers. What did you get for Christmas?

  3. I held a gay guys face on after his meth head coked out boy friend smashed it with a crescent wrench.
    The part that I was most shocked buy was that I was so shocked these two gays traveled with a set of crescent wrenches.

  4. i got window tinting for my car.... and socks

  5. "because I had olives to burn" ....ahahaha oh lol. The entire post made me laugh actually, right down to the end. Sorry your Christmas was crappy but it made for a brilliant post. lol Cheers to a Happy New Year!

  6. Hey beautiful! Don't be a stranger around these parts.


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