20 March 2009

Giving me a break

*I HAD a picture here of a man holding up a sign saying "homosexuals are possessed by demons" at some kind of political rally. The pic was taken down from the site I got it from, soon after, the pic disappeared from my post and even the link to the site stopped working. This was my response to that picture you can no longer see:

I'm not possessed by demons, I only have one, and mine sounds and looks like lovable actress Nell Carter from the 80's hit T.V. series "Gimme A Break." I asked Nell: "Nell? Why do people fear what they don't know or what they won't try to understand?" She answered:

"How the Hell should I know THAT? Where am I? Am I dead?! Who are you? I'm a Tony Award winning Broadway star, I'm not a real maid who gives out motherly advice on a sitcom you idiot. And I'm sorry, who are you again??? I'm dead and I'm still fat, how did THAT happen?! I should eat carrots, I think then the pounds will just MELT away. You just can't trust those fancy diets. I tried those Slimfast diet shakes, but I can suck down six of those for lunch and I'm STILL hungry, Oh Lord but those are good! They say to exercise this and exercise that, but I'm a big girl and I don't sweat unless someone is chasing me... "

"Nell! You're not a ghost, you're my demon. Every gay man is allotted a demon while he is alive on this Earth and that demon takes on the form and persona of whomever that gay man has grown to know and love, you happen to be mine, lesbians get a demon too, but all of theirs sound and look like actor Stacey Keach for some reason, now can we stay on track here?"

"A demon?!! Well this just keeps on getting better and better doesn't it?! Sit down child, I'll answer your question, I don't know why, but I will." ::Nell puts my hands in hers::

"A long time ago my mama told me there are people who like 3 bean casseroles and those who don't, though for the world of me I don't understand why anybody wouldn't like 3 bean casseroles, but you know what? You not liking 3 bean casserole is all right, you know why I say that? Because my mama didn't like 3 bean casseroles and I loved my mama."

"I sure do love you Nell."

"I love you too baby, Now why don't you go and make us some salami and butter sandwiches while I figure out a way to get away from you."

5 comments:

  1. dang it, i wish i had seen that ridiculous picture. phooey.

    and chuck is not gay. i bet you would warm up to him sooner or later. maybe you will see him in your dreams tonight.....

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  2. here is a reminder of chuck for ya....

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  3. The numb nuts were so proud to have that picture on their site, wonder what made them have a change of heart? Because they looked like a joke? Because they looked like the bigoted dicks they claim not to be as Christians?

    Chuck is not my type, WAY not my type.

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  4. hmm. wish I could have seen the picture as well. doesn't surprise me, it's just sad. i love the ambience on your blog. and i also love the Chris Evans picture.

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  5. I found this picture of a poster (some type of urban art) that has the pic:

    http://www.flickr.com/photos/foocault/2824761946/in/pool-berlinfriedrichshain

    Your sweet for saying that, 'dark' doesn't always transfer well. And as for Chris Evans? He first caught my eye in "Not Another Teen Movie." Whip Cream never looked so good.

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I eat your comments with jam and butter.