27 August 2013

I Dream Of Jonkey

I keep on dreaming about that finkle Johnny Depp. I think he's a corny actor who'll swan dive off a cliff to steal a scene from his fellow thespeens on top of doing zilch for me attraction wise. God knows why he keeps on popping into my dream world with what always seems to be a roommate-type situation, like we're two straight boys shacking up. Last night I woke up in my dream with my head on his stomach talking about what we would be for Halloween. Apparently we share a room designed in a 1960's hippy style. I'm thinking how I can talk my dream self into torching our groovy abode and destroying him from the inside out. One thing I'm glad about is that he never beat me within an inch of my life like Susan Sarandon did because I "couldn't get with the program."*

*I'll never forget that Sarandon you cunt!

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