09 June 2012


Russ and I went to garage sales this morning because God knows I can't get enough oscillating fans and Russ is always getting things that take at least 3 people to lift up. The 4th garage sale was at a beautiful house on a beautiful street in a beautiful neighborhood where for once they weren't selling a shit load of baby clothes (the little mounds of dirt in the backyard the size of a baby explains it all) and Atari games (who holds Atari games left over from the 80's and just NOW thinks Atari isn't going to make a comeback so why keep them?). Out steps from the house is this man who's stunning looks Greek poets write about. Russ almost peed himself like a puppie's "Happy Pee" and I swear cartoon birds where fluttering around him singing without Dopey, Happy or Sneezy. I think he had the most luxurious hair I've ever seen on our species and he talked to this little girl in the most sweetest, caring, kindest way that I think even SHE wanted to fuck him. I swear if you looked at him, you'd see sunshine and happiness halos, turning right from him to look at me and you'd see lightning and evil trees down a "Do Not Enter" stormy road. I heard one of the woman at the garage sale call out his name, Neal. Just being around Neal made me feel like a was a half-developed human being who comes from all kinds of fuckinesseses. Russ busted my balls all day about "Neal" and I'm trying to do some type of soul transference using his shirt and hat I bought like in the movie "The Mephisto Waltz."


  1. ah I love this! dont meet many people like neal
    Also that first sentence! LOL!

  2. I swear the guy was sucking up my negative energies and making Rice Krispie Squares out of them. I was going to lose it if he handed me a lollipop "Made of Good Wishes."

  3. I don't speak french but let me know if your soul transference works. I will be expecting a fuck ton of Nude photos from "neal" and also I still have a jock strap or two from some hot sweaty nights I spent with a Cuban god who I'd love to take the form of.

    I believe his name was Peek-Oh Dee-Guy Oh but then you can't hold it against him. Those wacky islanders aren't as creative as the Nords when it comes to naming their god/children/sex pots.


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