03 March 2009

California Land

Disneyland has an adjacent California WITHIN California, "California Land." Walt must have been half-crocked when he came up with this idea. It's like putting an exact replica of my living room right down the street from me. If your a tourist, you could visit the actual Cali sites instead of seeing Disney's tweeked version of it. One part of the park is called "Bug Country" because we all know how giant insects and children go together. I heard rumors Disney theme parks are control freaks in how they are aware of your every move, 3 vodka sodas and a bottle of wine on an empty stomach later (Ariel's Grotto has a full bar) we found out how true that was. Russ noticed we were being followed by two men who were almost comedic in how they tried to stay hidden with what was obviously a tail. It didn't help that we got into a drunken fight (when I get drunk, I either want to fight you or make out with you, you choose) with me telling Russ to go throw himself in "Paradise Pier" while he threatened to leave me in "San Francisco Town" (has a show tour of Rosie 'O Donnell baking bread, or was it making tortillas? It's all a little blurry). Children were crying all around us, but it was probably because of the pissed-off looking ladybugs, 7 foot tall grasshoppers, or the giant caterpillar train crawling around the park and not because of us (I think I slurred to a little girl "what are YOU looking at? Or it could have been a cardboard cut-out of Tinker bell... like I said, it's a little blurry). Frik and Frak followed us as we went out of the park shouting obscenities at each other after only 3 hours in the park. With a "fuck you" and a "howda you do" we were out of there like Aladdin's genie smoke.

We stopped off at an Australian themed restaurant and a lesbian bar on the way home, but those are stories for another day.

Watching and waiting.


12 comments:

  1. Definetly something I'd pay to see at disney haha. Was it fun? :D

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  2. Ah California Adventure... I've really never been able to enjoy it unless I am a little drunk. It's like an acid trip in and of itself.

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  3. Yan,

    It's worth a one time visit. They have an ice cream shop named after my hometown (Burbank, CA). They did a good job with creating a tiny San Francisco (without the homos and slopey streets), they give you free sourdough bread on that bread making tour. They have their own California themed Main Street Parade and 3 of the rides are better than the ones at Disney.

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  4. Eliza,

    They WANT you to get drunk, unlike Disney where you can only get alcohol at that exclusive 33 Club in the whole park. They shouldn't have made it so easy for me to become a drunkin fool.

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  5. so was it a good birthday?!??!?!

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  6. My birthday is tomorrow. The post above is from the last time we went. We're staying at the Disney hotel this time around and I probably won't be here the rest of the week.

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  7. I meant that I'd pay to see a couple of drunk guys talking shit in disney, but thanks for the info anyways.

    Btw I like the new comment message "I eat your comments with jam and butter".. Kinda rhymes.

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  8. We were 5 minutes from security coming up to us and saying "Sirs, will you please come with us" and being taken to Disney jail if we idn't leave when we did.

    You don't dig my guy curser?

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  9. Have fun and happy birthday early! Weeeeee! Avoid Disney jail at all costs!

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  10. Hmmmm....big bugs freak me out and you should've thrown up on Mickey. I still have yet to go to any Disney themepark, but I'm sure I'd see a clown and freak out (I hate them). Sounds like you had a blast though, but oddly familiar at the same time.

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  11. Matt,

    Funny you bring up clowns. I saw this movie last night:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h4iIC10-UjM&feature=related

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I eat your comments with jam and butter.